Okay this is going to be hard digging up 5 facts people don’t already know about me, so I’ll do my best to dig deep. Considering also this is my year to be fully transparent I will hold nothing back tonight or in the future. I will try to dig some facts up from my younger days until I hit 15. Here goes.
Fact 1. I grew up on 50 acres between two houses. My parents house was on one side of the tennis court and my grandma’s house was this huge 10,000 sq ft house on the other. Although there was some terrible moments in my childhood this property gave me a lot of joy. I will never forget the days of “the big house.”
Fact 2. I always wanted to be famous. Guess that stems from my mother putting me into everything. I started dance at age 3, modelling around the same age, acting in my early teens, I played the saxophone, flute, sang in the children’s choir, but I was a terrible artist that went to a fine arts school. Ok ok ok that was a few facts rolled into one. Fact 2 I’m somewhat into the arts.
Fact 3. I am a high school drop out. At the age of 14 I was living with my step-father and that in itself was unhealthy. The details of this time can stay with me until I write my book. Let’s just say I grew up real fast.
Fact 4. My step-after was a full blown needle using addict. When he would take off for days at a time I sometimes had to collect rent from the numerous tenants that lived at his house. I came to love authority and again another reason for growing up so fast.
Fact 5. I met a guy online when I was 15. It was 1996 and the internet was fairly new to many of us. I made friends with people all over the states on this group chat called irc (internet relay chat) I went to San Francisco for my 16th birthday to be with this guy. Yep my parents let me……
Fact 6. Growing up at such a young age I pretty much lived the life of an adult by age 14. Bars, parties, travelling to the states for long periods of time, etc. This was my normal.
Fact 7. I mentioned this before but here it is again. Carnie up in here! Yep! Best time of my life actually. Travelling Canada and making money. Perfect! It also helped that my grandma put me up in a fifth wheel trailer and new truck so I could live my carnie dreams.
Fact 8. I birthed two children while living the carnie life. My two children’s father and I quit not long after my middle child was born and I never travelled with them again. I do however stay in contact with many of them today.
Fact 9. I was in an abusive relationship for almost 8 years. Sometimes it was good, sometimes it was great and many times it was hell. I came out of it a stronger person and I have spent the last 7 years finding myself. Trauma changes a person.
Fact 10. I never found myself to be attractive. I always settled after that relationship. I met a guy and we got married less than a month into the relationship. He saw someone willing to give him a comfy lifestyle and I thought I found someone that loved me.
Fact 11. We divorced less than 3 years later. I started realizing I’d rather be alone than with someone that didn’t love and respect me. He killed whatever small amount of confidence I had left in me.
Fact 12. I’ve tried committing suicide, I’ve cut myself and I’ve hated everything about myself. This was my rock bottom. The point when I couldn’t even stand to look at myself any more. Of course there is more to this story, but as above this I will save for my book. What I can say though is that there is Hope. I still have days where I wish I looked different but they are rare now. I’ve come to love myself and my journey. My story is who I am and I am willing to share it in hopes it helps lift others up.
Fact 13. 13 is not my lucky number 6 is.
Fact 14. I have 3 chapters published in books that hit international best seller. These chapters were my therapy. 1 was about my sexual abuse, 2 domestic abuse and 3 my handicapped brother and some insight on my upbringing. The best advice I have other than investing in yourself is to write your story. Even if to share with one person. It is the most freeing thing I have ever done in my life. I will continue to write now because of this leap I took.
Fact 15, I’m part black. Yes I am native obviously and definitely resonate with my indigenous culture the most, but I definitely embrace my African American side too. I am proud of all my cultures. Can’t forget I am Métis and Norwegian too. Peep that mix yo.
Well that wasn’t hard at all! Come back tomorrow for my playlist shuffled and the first 15 songs it gives me. This should be interesting as I go from gangsta rap to country in a heartbeat.
Stay Strong
xx Badassbon